The enormity of pain parents feel when their child passes away is unfathomable for those of us who haven’t experienced such a tragic and untimely loss. In my work as a medium I often feel the agony the family feels, and I fight to contain my emotions. Please understand that through experience, and learning to control these emotions, doesn’t mean I’m uncaring, or that I don’t have empathy. The truth couldn’t be furthest from this!
I try to remain in control of myself so that I can continue to serve both spirit and you. What good would I be to anyone if I were to allow myself to fall into a puddle of tears? Repressing the emotions does take its toll, however. I feel drained, lethargic, mentally tapped out, and often schedule breaks in my schedule for “Me” days. Me days where I’m not intentionally connecting to the world of spirit because I need the mental break, days when I take care of my emotional, physical, mental and spiritual health. Days where I can sit and do nothing in a mental void, watch silly and meaningless television shows, craft to my hearts content, take a leisurely walk, or even spend time at the spa.
So, if you know of someone who has lost a child, please empathize with them, but don’t burden them with feeling the need to console YOU. Don’t try to compare their pain to someone else’s and surely not your own. Just be the open door they may need. Allow them to shed their tears openly. Listen with a compassionate year, and open your heart to send them your love. Hold their hand, hug them if that’s what they need, allow them to talk through their sorrows, as this is one step in their journey of moving past the trauma of losing a child.
© 2016 Lisa Bousson
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